This is.. strange. I suppose that would work at a lack of a more fitting word.
I could not fall asleep last night. I do not know why, and it is quite confusing. I went to bed just after midnight but I simply could not fall asleep. I tried with music, without it, with blankets, without them, with cat, without cat. Though I might say that she did not aprove of getting removed from the bedroom and returned shortly.
Everytime I laid down and tried to relax I got this.. nasty feeling. You know when there is something that you fear or that you definitely dont want to be a part of? You know how you feel the night before. That sick, twisting feeling in your stomach? Everytime I laid down, it was there. It did not matter what I tried. Atalantis, Moya, Eureka, home, away, here, there.. Nothing worked. When I got up to get a glass of water, it went away. When I went back to bed it came back. Everytime I got out of bed it left, as if it had never been there. And the strange thing was; I almost believed it. I could hardly remember having it and I never believed that it would come back. Yet it did. Over and over again.
At half past three I gave up. Took a warm shower, got dressed and crawled up in the couch for a session of KotOR2 on my Xbox. I was not tired and I had not been during the entire night. At six I decided to try again and went to bed. The feeling didnt come back but I was so restless that it felt as if my very skin was trying to crawl away. So at seven I gave up, again. Second time in one night and took another shower before I finished cleaning the apartment.
My parents showed up a few minutes before nine. I decided to make a Daim-cheesecake withouth thinking about the fact that I would never be able to finish it on my own. They were only to happy to render assistance. Or so they said. They only took one slice each. So now I have to have more guests over. Perfect.
Since I have the afternoon shift this week I got on the 13.00 bus and now I got tired, and would have fallen asleep if it would not have been for me constantly biting my tongue.
Now its half past six in the afternoon. I have been up for just about 36 hours. Not that there is anything to worry about, I usually do not get any trouble from lack of sleep until three-four nights withouth sleep. The almost-falling-aslepp-on-the-bus was strange enough but now I feel.. empty. I can not even summon the energy to get annoyed at the more then rude customers I have had since Sara left. Three women who would have had me furious any other night. Now I just sigh and shake my head.
I cant seem to focus my thoughts. They shatter lite butterflies on a field and I can not catch them to put them back together. I do not have the words to describe where I am or what it feels like. Perhaps.. At peace?
2012-02-10
2011-11-28
Why should I have to take this? Two children, little boys who for some reason seems to believe that they are men, whining because they dont think that I pay them enough attention.
Why the hell should I pay attention to someone who doesnt listen, who does NOT respect my decisions or me, someone who is not family when I am spending all of my waking time fighting. Fighting to stay afloat. Trying desperately to keep my head above the surface. If I give in or get distracted for just a second, then I will fall. And I wont be able to get back up again.
Worse and worse. The shadows are back and everything is just.. frelled.
For crying out loud, not even the con helped. Everynow and then I got a con-high but whenever no one talked to me, or I was alone it went away and I fell back into it.
And today I recieved a letter in the mail. Not even gonna bother opening it. No one has the right to push me further down or try to make me feel bad.
I´ve had it with those kind of guys.
Why the hell should I pay attention to someone who doesnt listen, who does NOT respect my decisions or me, someone who is not family when I am spending all of my waking time fighting. Fighting to stay afloat. Trying desperately to keep my head above the surface. If I give in or get distracted for just a second, then I will fall. And I wont be able to get back up again.
Worse and worse. The shadows are back and everything is just.. frelled.
For crying out loud, not even the con helped. Everynow and then I got a con-high but whenever no one talked to me, or I was alone it went away and I fell back into it.
And today I recieved a letter in the mail. Not even gonna bother opening it. No one has the right to push me further down or try to make me feel bad.
I´ve had it with those kind of guys.
2011-10-15
My speech for English C
The Stargate Franchise
Most people scuff when they hear the words Sci-fi or science fiction. A lot of them would think about the very cheap and far from good books and movies that have been released over the years. Yet a lot of people are fond of the Star Wars movies without even thinking about the fact that they are science fiction. Most people are dead set on the thought that only nerds and geeks watch science fiction. In that case, I am a nerd. I love science fiction, I live it and I breathe it. But that does not make me any different from my family or friends. In fact, we are all after the same thing: Entertainment.
There is so much in the Stargate franchise that would appeal to different people, from the age of 5 to 85, and I am always trying to find ways for people to see this. The franchise is easiest described as a military science fiction show, but it is also filled with mythology, religion, politics and a lot of humour.
What is now the Stargate franchise began in 1994 when Metro-Goldwyn-Meyer released the movie Stargate. It tells us the story about a transportation device called a Stargate that was found at a dig in Giza in 1928. Kept safe by the US government and the military they finally get it to work and send a team through the gate to a planet called Abydos. There, they come upon a race called the Goa´uld. They are parasitic beings that use humans as hosts as well as slaves and live in the image of ancient gods. The team fight the Goa´uld, free the people and most of the team returns home. It is a classic tale of good fighting bad and, like most times, good prevails.
The movie was a hit, big enough to create a Canadian based spin-off series three years later, a show that ran until 2007. The name of the show was Stargate SG-1. The story was in some ways different from the movie. For example the show gave us a lot of humour which I know for a fact is one of the thing that have given it so many fans. For ten years the US Air Force sent out teams to hundreds of different planets. But while they spent a lot of those ten years out in the universe there were a lot of things happening on our own planet. Politicians have been one of Stargate Command’s greatest foes on earth and I find the arguments, and even the back-stabbing, quite realistic. Since Stargate SG-1 was such a success with the fans another spinoff was created in 2004 called Stargate Atlantis. Having more or less the same storyline as SG-1 it stood out in by the fact that it took place all the way out in the Pegasus galaxy where we were introduced to a new foe. This series ran for five years and gave us the same mix as the previous show with a lot of influences from military, science and humour.
In 2009 a third spinoff series was created named Stargate Universe that lasted until 2011 when it was cancelled. Unlike the other two shows, Universe was leaning more to the grim side and as the characters gets completely cut off from Earth the show has a feeling of doom yet they never give up hope of getting home.
In 2008 Metro-Goldwyn-Meyer released two movies set during the Stargate SG-1 series, Continuum and Ark of truth. For a short period of time during 2002 there was also an animated show called Stargate Infinity that took place 30 years after the first trip through the Stargate.
Despite the fact that all the shows are now cancelled, the Stargate franchise is far from dead. Every year Fandemonium publishes new novels that take place in the Stargate Universe. There are also graphic novels, games, toys and a lot more merchandise to keep the fans satisfied. And for the extremist there are always conventions that take place all year round.
A classic convention takes place from Friday to Sunday with guest appearances from actors, writers and directors. Usually each guest spends about 30-60 minutes on stage where they answer questions from the fans or tell stories from their life or the show. You will also have the opportunity to get an autograph and a photo taken of you and each actor. There are also dinners, cocktail parties, karaoke parties and competitions to attend during the weekend and that is where my favourite part about the conventions enter the picture; you get to meet your fellow fans. The people who truly have been the reason for the success of the Stargate franchise.
At the end of Stargate Atlantis’s third season the writers made a terrible mistake. They killed the very popular character Dr. Carson Beckett, the Scottish hearth of Atlantis, which really made the fans upset. When the episode aired the response was immediate. Overnight the fans had created their very own campaign which has its own website even now. Save Carson Beckett dot com. The fans could not believe what had happened, and they would not accept it. They wrote to the writers and the directors as well as all kinds of different magazines and actually managed to get a lot of attention to this monstrous act. For several months the actors of Atlantis could look out the window and see a group of protesters, all with signs saying “Save Carson Beckett.” And this is when we really got proof that the fans are indeed the fuel of the show and that our voices can be heard. Since science fiction is science fiction they brought Beckett back to the show, as a clone. Quite handy and perhaps a bit sketchy but at least we got out Carson back and we all silently agreed to ignore the tiny gap of logic that suddenly introduced full-grown clones to series.
The conventions give you a wonderful opportunity to discuss things like this with fans from all over the world, from Finland to Australia. You will most definitely return home with fond memories and a lot of new friends.
Most people scuff when they hear the words Sci-fi or science fiction. A lot of them would think about the very cheap and far from good books and movies that have been released over the years. Yet a lot of people are fond of the Star Wars movies without even thinking about the fact that they are science fiction. Most people are dead set on the thought that only nerds and geeks watch science fiction. In that case, I am a nerd. I love science fiction, I live it and I breathe it. But that does not make me any different from my family or friends. In fact, we are all after the same thing: Entertainment.
There is so much in the Stargate franchise that would appeal to different people, from the age of 5 to 85, and I am always trying to find ways for people to see this. The franchise is easiest described as a military science fiction show, but it is also filled with mythology, religion, politics and a lot of humour.
What is now the Stargate franchise began in 1994 when Metro-Goldwyn-Meyer released the movie Stargate. It tells us the story about a transportation device called a Stargate that was found at a dig in Giza in 1928. Kept safe by the US government and the military they finally get it to work and send a team through the gate to a planet called Abydos. There, they come upon a race called the Goa´uld. They are parasitic beings that use humans as hosts as well as slaves and live in the image of ancient gods. The team fight the Goa´uld, free the people and most of the team returns home. It is a classic tale of good fighting bad and, like most times, good prevails.
The movie was a hit, big enough to create a Canadian based spin-off series three years later, a show that ran until 2007. The name of the show was Stargate SG-1. The story was in some ways different from the movie. For example the show gave us a lot of humour which I know for a fact is one of the thing that have given it so many fans. For ten years the US Air Force sent out teams to hundreds of different planets. But while they spent a lot of those ten years out in the universe there were a lot of things happening on our own planet. Politicians have been one of Stargate Command’s greatest foes on earth and I find the arguments, and even the back-stabbing, quite realistic. Since Stargate SG-1 was such a success with the fans another spinoff was created in 2004 called Stargate Atlantis. Having more or less the same storyline as SG-1 it stood out in by the fact that it took place all the way out in the Pegasus galaxy where we were introduced to a new foe. This series ran for five years and gave us the same mix as the previous show with a lot of influences from military, science and humour.
In 2009 a third spinoff series was created named Stargate Universe that lasted until 2011 when it was cancelled. Unlike the other two shows, Universe was leaning more to the grim side and as the characters gets completely cut off from Earth the show has a feeling of doom yet they never give up hope of getting home.
In 2008 Metro-Goldwyn-Meyer released two movies set during the Stargate SG-1 series, Continuum and Ark of truth. For a short period of time during 2002 there was also an animated show called Stargate Infinity that took place 30 years after the first trip through the Stargate.
Despite the fact that all the shows are now cancelled, the Stargate franchise is far from dead. Every year Fandemonium publishes new novels that take place in the Stargate Universe. There are also graphic novels, games, toys and a lot more merchandise to keep the fans satisfied. And for the extremist there are always conventions that take place all year round.
A classic convention takes place from Friday to Sunday with guest appearances from actors, writers and directors. Usually each guest spends about 30-60 minutes on stage where they answer questions from the fans or tell stories from their life or the show. You will also have the opportunity to get an autograph and a photo taken of you and each actor. There are also dinners, cocktail parties, karaoke parties and competitions to attend during the weekend and that is where my favourite part about the conventions enter the picture; you get to meet your fellow fans. The people who truly have been the reason for the success of the Stargate franchise.
At the end of Stargate Atlantis’s third season the writers made a terrible mistake. They killed the very popular character Dr. Carson Beckett, the Scottish hearth of Atlantis, which really made the fans upset. When the episode aired the response was immediate. Overnight the fans had created their very own campaign which has its own website even now. Save Carson Beckett dot com. The fans could not believe what had happened, and they would not accept it. They wrote to the writers and the directors as well as all kinds of different magazines and actually managed to get a lot of attention to this monstrous act. For several months the actors of Atlantis could look out the window and see a group of protesters, all with signs saying “Save Carson Beckett.” And this is when we really got proof that the fans are indeed the fuel of the show and that our voices can be heard. Since science fiction is science fiction they brought Beckett back to the show, as a clone. Quite handy and perhaps a bit sketchy but at least we got out Carson back and we all silently agreed to ignore the tiny gap of logic that suddenly introduced full-grown clones to series.
The conventions give you a wonderful opportunity to discuss things like this with fans from all over the world, from Finland to Australia. You will most definitely return home with fond memories and a lot of new friends.
2011-09-18
2011-07-30
The men, women and children murdered in Norway 2011-07-22
Johannes Buø, 14 år, Mandal
Sharidyn Svebakk-Böhn, 14, Drammen.
Karin Elena Holst, 15, Rana.
Kevin Daae Berland, 15 år, Askøy
Modupe Ellen Awoyemi, 15 år, Drammen
Birgitte Smetbak, 15, Nötteröy
Eivind Hovden, 15 år, Tokke
Margrethe Böyum Klöven, 16, Bärum.
Emil Okkenhaug, 16, Levanger
Åsta Sofie Helland Dahl, 16, Sortland.
Aleksader Aas Eriksen, 16, Meråker.
Elisabeth Trönnes Lie, 16, Halden.
Ruth Benedicte Vatndal Nilsen, 16, Tønsberg.
Steinar Jessen, 16, Alta.
Thomas Margida Antonsen, 16, Oslo.
Andrine Bekkene Espeland, 16, Fredrikstad.
Marianne Sandvik, 16 år, Stavanger
Espen Jörgensen, 17, Bodö.
Victoria Stenberg, 17, Nes.
Isabel Victoria Green Sogn, 17, Oslo.
Isa Beathe Rogne, 17, Östre Toten
Torjus Jakobsen Blattman, 17, Kristiansand.
Lejla Selaci, 17, Fredrikstad.
Håkon Ødegaard, 17 år, år, Trondheim
Sondre Furseth Dale, 17 år, Haugesund
Maria Maagerø Johannesen, 17 år, Nøtterøy
Andreas Dalby Grønnesby, 17 år, Stange
Sondre Kjøren, 17 år, Orkdal
Gizem Dogan, 17 år, Trondheim
Silje Merete Fjellbu, 17, Tinn.
Syvert Knudsen, 17, Lyngdal.
Eva Kathinka Lütken, 17 år, Sarpsborg
Ronja Söttar Johansen, 17, Vefsn.
Bendik Rosnæs Ellingsen, 18 år, Rygge
Simon Säbö, 18, Salangen.
Synne Röyneland, 18, Oslo.
Even Flugstad Malmedal, 18, Gjövik.
Bano Abobakar Rashid, 18, Nesodden.
Guro Vartdal Håvoll, 18 år, Ørsta
Silje Stamneshagen, 18 år, Askøy
Mona Abdinur 18, Oslo.
Anders Kristiansen, 18, Bardu.
Andreas Edvardsen,18, Sarpsborg.
Monica Iselin Didriksen, 18, Sund.
Carina Borgund, 18, Oslo.
Ingrid Berg Heggelund, 18, Ås.
Tarald Kuven Mjelde, 18, Osteröy.
Tina Sukuvara, 18, Vadsö.
Fredrik Lund Schjetne, 18, Eidsvoll.
Henrik Rasmussen, 18, Hadsel.
Karar Mustafa Qasim, 19, Vestby.
Ismail Haji Ahmed, 19 år, Hamar
Lene Maria Bergum, 19 år, Namsos
Diderik Aamodt Olsen, 19, Nesodden.
Hanne Kristine Fridtun, 19 år, Stryn
Jamil Rafal Mohamad Jamil, 20, Eigersund.
Torw Eikeland, 21, Bergen.
Håvard Vederhus, 21, Oslo.
Porntid Ardam, 21, Oslo.
Gunnar Linaker, 23, Bardu.
Tamta Lipartelliani, 23 år, Georgien
Rolf Christopher Johansen Perreau, 25 år, Trondheim
Kjersti Berg Sand, 26 år, Nord-Odal
Henrik André Pedersen, 27 år, Porsanger
Sverre Flåte Bjørkavåg, 28 år, Sula
Hanne Ekroll Lövlie, 30, Oslo.
Snorre Haller, 30 år, Trondheim
Kai Hauge, 32, Oslo.
Jon Vegard Lervåg, 32, Oslo.
Ida Marie Hill, 34, Oslo.
Rune Havdal, 43, Övre Eiker
Hanne A. Balch Fjalestad, 43, Lunner.
Monica Elisabeth Bösei, 45, Hole.
Anne Lise Holter, 51, Våler i Östfold.
Trond Berntsen, 51, Övre Eiker.
Tove Åshill Knutsen, 56, Oslo.
Hanna M. Orvik Endresen, 61, Oslo.
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